The Short But Interesting Life Of The Article III Clerk

A couple days ago I stumbled upon a twitter account "Article III Clerk." It purported to be a young federal judicial clerk to an older judge (Bio: "Current law clerk for a Senior U.S. District Judge on the East Coast. He’s really fucking old, so I roll the dice of justice on my own"}, and he tweeted with the arrogance of, well, some young federal judicial law clerks.

I had a suspicion it was a joke. It was over the top.

"The opposition you filed was goddamn unreadable. You think I want 10 more typo-ridden pages about what light I should view evidence in?"

It was actually funny. He thought out loud about the stupidity of pleadings he received, claimed his judge was never around (and senile) so he was running the place, and he had 127 followers.

But it was also, well, strong:

"Judge called from home today to “check in.” I got it under control you senile fuck. Go back to napping underneath 20 blankets."

"I really, really hope the Judge doesn’t die while I’m clerking."

I, being the all powerful with about 3,700 followers on twitter (some who actually aren't spam bots or porn peddlers) asked why he only had 127 followers.

With an hour he had 40 more.

Then he got the attention of Eric Turkewitz, who also wondered if it was a joke:

If truthful, he’s revealed that he works for a senior federal judge on the east coast who may not be well, that he is 27, and the court clerk is female. That’s a lot of biographical data to narrow down the possibilities. Also, that he’s incredibly arrogant for a young pup that may never have stood in the well himself.

And now he's gone. Poof. Deleted his account.

It could only be because it was true.

And for anyone practicing in his judge's court, that's pretty scary.

Of course there will be those who will say he was "bullied" off twitter. You know, the other liars and frauds that want to peddle their thoughts and consulting services to desperate lawyers? They'll whine and cry and say Turk was mean and that poor young kid got scared.

I say he got smart, and ended it before it was too late.

Maybe.

It's never too late to make a U-turn, unless you've already gone off the cliff.

Anonymous comments are welcome as long as they say something relevant and half-way intelligent and arent a vehicle for a coward to attack someone. I trust you understand. Located in Miami, Florida, Brian Tannebaum practices Bar Admission and Discipline and Criminal Defense. He is the author of I Got A Bar Complaint.